Disclaimer

Welcome to The Sutherland Shire Gazette—your trusted source for completely untrustworthy news.

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1. Satire, Not Serious Journalism

Let’s get one thing straight: everything you read here is satire. That means our stories are entirely fictional, exaggerated for comedic effect, and not to be taken seriously (much like local Facebook group drama).

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If you’re here looking for hard-hitting investigative journalism, we suggest you check out an actual news website. If you’re here because you love a bit of Shire-based banter, you’re in the right place.

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2. No Responsibility for Misinterpretation

If you somehow mistake one of our articles for real news and start an online crusade, that’s on you. We take zero responsibility for any confusion, outrage, or heated group chats that may result from our content.

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3. Offence Not Intended

Our goal is to entertain, not to offend (unless you’re the person who designed the parking situation at Southgate—then yes, we are coming for you). If you find yourself deeply upset by our articles, we recommend taking a deep breath, enjoying a stroll along Cronulla Esplanade, and remembering that it's just a joke.

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4. External Links & Third-Party Content

Sometimes we link to real websites, but that doesn’t mean we endorse them. If you click on an external link and end up in a weird part of the internet, that’s your own adventure.

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5. Liability & Legal Mumbo Jumbo

We are not liable for:

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• Any reputational damage caused by someone believing our satire is real.

• Any heated debates with friends or family about whether Miranda Fair is still called Miranda Fair.

• Any impulsive meat tray purchases inspired by our articles.

Basically, if our content causes you any form of existential crisis, we advise you to take a deep breath and remember: it’s all just a bit of fun.

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6. Contact Us

Still confused? Need to vent? Want to send us a strongly worded email? Feel free to contact us:

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📧 Email: info@sutherlandshiregazette.com
📍 Address: Somewhere deep in the Shire, probably near a Bunnings.

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Thanks for reading—now go forth and spread the satire (responsibly, of course).