SPECIAL INVESTIGATION: Menai, Bangor & Illawong Declare ‘Sh-exit’: Push for Independence Sparks Chaos

Blake Curran | Investigative Journalist | Sutherland Shire Gazette

15 January 2025

In a stunning political twist, the suburbs of Menai, Bangor, and Illawong have launched a bold campaign to secede from the Sutherland Shire, citing "decades of neglect, cultural misunderstanding, and unfair mockery about being ‘too far inland.’" The movement, officially branded Sh-exit, seeks to establish a fully independent microstate modeled on the European principality of Liechtenstein.

“We're tired of being treated like the forgotten cousins of the Shire,” declared campaign leader Trent Malloy during a heated press conference held outside Menai’s iconic Bunnings car park.

“Why should we be bound by Cronulla’s beach-driven agenda when our hearts lie with rugged bushwalks and ample parking?”

Early policy proposals for the would-be state — tentatively named Bangalongia — include its own postal system, a local currency called the Menai Dollar (backed by unused Bunnings gift cards), and mandatory four-wheel-drive ownership.

However, Shirexit’s most controversial move is a proposed toll on the Woronora Bridge, set at a hefty $12 for non-residents. In response, frustrated commuters have taken to hiking and kayaking across the Woronora River to avoid the toll, sparking a boom in second-hand kayak sales on local Facebook Marketplace groups.

Critics argue the toll is nothing more than a cash grab.

“I’m not paying $12 just to visit my mother-in-law in Bangor,” fumed Sylvania resident Brett Holden. "I’d rather paddle across the river like a bushman from the 1800s."

Despite backlash, Sh-exit supporters remain defiant. “We’ll thrive as an independent state,” insisted Malloy. “We’ve got everything we need: schools, Bunnings, and three separate Thai restaurants. What more could a sovereign nation want?”

Talks of installing a customs checkpoint outside Menai Marketplace are already underway. Visitors may soon need passports — or at least proof of a recent kayak purchase — to enter.

Menai, Bangor, Illawong Declare Sh-exit Independence