The Sutherland Shire Gazette Launches: Sutherland Shire Braces For Hard-Hitting Local Nonsense.

Sandy Shores | Editor in Chief | Sutherland Shire Gazette

22 December 2025

After years of enduring actual news and sensible updates, Sutherland Shire residents can finally rejoice — The Shire Gazette has officially launched, promising to deliver all the stories no one asked for but everyone will talk about.

The Gazette’s editorial team, consisting of “seasoned professionals”, has pledged to cover everything from suspiciously perfect lawns in Kirrawee to Burraneer’s ongoing struggle to accept traffic roundabouts as a concept.

“Our mission is clear,” said Editor-in-Chief Sandy Shores. “We exist to provide the kind of investigative journalism that makes you say, ‘Wait, is this real?’ while nervously sipping your flat white.”

The inaugural issue includes explosive exposés such as Shocking! Local Man Claims His Secret Surf Spot Is Just 'Out There Somewhere', and Exclusive: Cronulla Sand Allegedly Imported from Unknown Beach.

Upcoming investigative reports will tackle pressing community debates, including the escalating turf wars between Gen-Z e-bike riders and Boomers defending footpath sanctity, as well as the fiercely contested title of “Best Microbrewery in the Shire,” a matter locals take more seriously than council elections.

Council officials, when asked about The Shire Gazette, responded with a diplomatic “No comment".

Subscriptions are free, but emotional investment is mandatory. Expect breaking stories, unapologetic opinions, and updates no one knew they needed — all with the reliability of a Cronulla weather forecast.

Welcome to The Shire Gazette: Because Reality Wasn’t Ridiculous Enough.

Sutherland Shire Gazette Launch